Lip Service
I have had a rocky relationship with my father for the majority of my life. Looking back at my childhood the bonding moments we had were very few and far between. A lot of that had to do with him working a second shift job and him not being home till after I had already gone to sleep during the school year. When I was eleven my parents got a divorce and I saw my father even less. As I got older I grew really bitter toward my father for him not being the kind of dad I wanted him to be. As time went by and I became a Christian I realized I needed to forgive my father for healing to take place. I said I forgave him and that I was over all the negative feelings that I had harboring toward him. It was easy for me to say this as long as he remained at a distance from me. When my father actually started putting forth an effort to have more of a relationship with me I wanted to run as far from him as I could. I figured out the forgiveness I had given him was merely lip service and did not come from the heart. I am just now starting to spend time with my father and actually letting wounds heal. There are so many things in life that are easier said than done but most broken relationships are worth the effort it takes to truly mend them.
